Conversation

This is just an one sided conversation just like your crush🤭, SORRY for that.

Ohkkk so I just started and now I am out of topics, shit happens, mmmmm, How should I

start ??? Yesss, Yesss, nooooooo ! I don't know how you deal with that no topic stuff, I am

feeling this now but actually topics never end. You remember that you once asked that what

will happen if we run out of topics, we ran out of topics and nothing happened, I mean isn't

that great, I know it is, you can't reply abhi. So it's like one of my biggest fears standing right

in front of me and that's talking with no topic. What if this becomes boring by the end but no,

no way, I can't let this happen. What if one day your kids read this and say 'MOM you had a

really boring friend' that shit would take time to heal.

So maybe I can start by thanking you for hanging around. It's like more than a year of our

friendship when I am writing this, this may feel small like how long a year is, but considering

that most of the time spent is online, it is great for real. I remember that 5 year bet of yours,

this easily will surpass that time. Its 12.10 right now, with one leg on one chair one on the floor,

one hand in box of chana ('chickpeas' sounds lame) thinking of stuff to talk about. Like, see your

magic on me, who thought I would be dedicating someone something that too while eating

that too at night. Yeah, but you are great, you know, yes you obviously know. Is this boring ?

Your kids are going to clown me if this becomes boring. I am feeling like Chandler, you don't

know. No worries Chandler and Rachel were just friends. We can talk about the movies that

you made me watch, they were boring but still, I can't even name them because of your kids.

Till today I have watched only kind of 6-7 movies, 2 which you told, 3 were John Wick parts and

other just while sitting with someone else. Why am I talking about this. I should talk about stuff

related to you. I wish you could forget that newsletter so that I would have something. You know

that You are the first friend because of whom I have stayed awake, not because I was chatting

with you or something but just because you told me something which was bothering you.

I swear I ain't lying and I won't be lying. Do you realize that the lyrics of the songs which you

said to me to listen when missing you are somewhat relatable now- "It's been way to long since

I seen, looked you in your eyes" Isn't that great. No maybe, lyrics are good but not good though.

Is it boring ? Yes it is, your kids won't even look into my eyes. More than 25 boys had crush on

you, do you ever wonder that how beautiful you would be for something like this. Yes Kids, more

than 25 at the age of just 15. You remember one thing, that when I told you the news about me

shifting and you asked for some promises like video chat, messages daily, calls, promise was kept

because none of them happened except the messages. You don't probably know that how many

times you have ruined my jokes or flirts which had a set-up, I mean like I would say something as

a base of the set-up expecting a specific reply and you would just reply something very unwanted.

It has happened many times. You were maybe good at spoiling this. Like yeah, What would a

Snorlax know about this stuff. I never thought it before now but you and Rihanna have some

similarities like you both have a good voice (I haven't heard you sing though), you both have a

great body, both look beautiful even without make-up, many people have had crush on you.

You know my favorite photo of yours is the one in which you are wearing a red suit with golden

spots on it, you look gorgeous in that, like extremely. No kids, I ain't hittin on your mom calm down.

If I ever date someone, not me but my brain would just compare that girl with you, like a benchmark,

you don't know how difficult it gon be. You remember that long paragraph you wrote in which you

listed every possible bad thing in me, maybe I said that it was good, but I knew every thing on it

already but hopefully the case isn't same anymore. I don't understand that why you think that it is

difficult to handle you but I never felt it, I mean like you've said that few times. You are like that once

in a lifetime thing, this may not happen ever again. You know na that every stuff I am saying and I will

say is true, nothing is made-up. I can't think of more stuff though. When I say overthinking, I mean

the stuff like that meeting stuff of all friends. I mean like do you really think, that it gon happen and

then creating fake scenarios of what all bad I can do to you, do you really think that it really makes

any sense in the practical world. You have asked me to rate you a few times, don't ask me that

please, because my knowledge of counting is limited. If I try to recollect the major events of my

life according to age than I can easily say that meeting you for the age 16 and being with you at

17 you share 16 wala spot with 'Finding J.Cole' but you still prevail, 18 is close, Hey maybe its 15

too, It was when we met, So it's like 3 years of you being major event of different age. Hat-trick hn.

Niceeeee. By Event I mean our friendship. Yes it's an event, a big one.

Maybe I should tell you about some of my mistakes that I have made till now, maybe no till would

make this boring, but still, it maybe someday can be of some help. Ohkkk Listen or Tolerate

whatever. Always focus on the goal never let go them, I see that you are focused on your studies

that's great, just don't let anything distract you ever. If something bothers you, talk about it or face it

don't ever try to sneak from reality. Always and by always I mean ALWAYS, have someone with whom

you can share your stuff which is making you feel low or is bothering you a lot, maybe not too much but

keep sharing your things, so they don't become a big thing and strike much harder, when things get hard.

Overthink a bit less, I know sometimes it is fun, sometimes not sometimes but always you win an

argument in them but still they silently harm, it can't be stopped but reduced and maybe you are working

on it and that nice. That's some of the stuff which you should may consider.

But this ain't no knowledge camp or something, this is, this is just a conversation and honest one though.

I don't remember anything from you know the past, or maybe we have already talked about all that.

There was a thing in the newsletter stating 'tu to latak hi gyi' it was not complete maybe tb yaad nhi aya.

I thought that maybe if I don't talk in a friendly manner(which was my normal way to talk to the ones who

were not my friend) you would not come back, so I did this and I was like okay she dealt with it. Then I was

too eager to know the crush, I thought that maybe you will talk less but again nothing happened, you again

won. Thank you and god that you did face it pretty nicely. That TT thing which you keep saying, let me clear

it, NO !!!! I never did that why would I do that, you were no enemy to me. maybe you just felt it because you

wanted more time on the table. On the teacher's day you were saying that something was not good with

your dress or make-up or something I don't know but my first reaction when I stepped inside the door was

WOAH....! Maybe I've told you this. You look immensely awesome in suits by the way. Once you told me

about the comments on your body by your classmates, I was awake that night for too long, I was unable to

sleep and you were the only thing in my mind that time, I wanted to help but was unable to, I had no solution

for it. After years of being outspoken, I worked on the words that I speak, made a control on them and

became difficult to be trapped in my own words but you a 5 '3'' creature did that so easily when we were

talking about that crush and something stuff, that was shocking because it never happened and I was

mostly the person who would do that to someone. You should be appreciated for that but no. Chane hi saath

hn is raat bhi. I have a every consistent craving of making you emotional by something which I do, but how

can a written stuff do that, I tried this in them lyrics, but I don't think it happened. No worries I won't do

anything wrong to make it happen. Remember one thing that at your wedding I need everything I told you

I wasn't joking, I would seriously shout 'I Still Love You' and run or maybe I would say 'Meet Me In The

Basement' yeah this would be better and too much fun. Just a thing, Rachel had a child before

marriage, but you don't do that, I know I consider you similar to Rachel but you don't need to prove it this

way I mean, you can but don't. A scene from FRIENDS remind me of you and that was like for the

complete scene, its in season 7 you would have watched that till now, but its when Joey cancels his

plans with Phoebe and Phoebe gives him a good lecture. That reminded me of you a lot. Yes, that hug,

yeah, that was warm, I mean like there are few people whose were cold, those ain't good. Do you think

that this could have been better much before if you told me the hurt you were dealing with, when I asked

you about you being upset, like three times, three different times though, maybe my fault I didn't ask

more than once hn. I've noticed that you have started giving me blunt replies, I mean like they are great,

but, I love them, unexpected, because I have never faced them, no one has ever replied in those ways,

It's like not you, you know nothing, I love it, that's something learned maybe. Thank Me Later. It's not like,

I like to be replied in that way coz who would like to be silenced, I mean like I don't hate mtlb it ain't

offensive, mtlb kya bc, smjh rhi h na vaise to, it's good. Like you were on the day when we were discussing

your first relationship, that ain't good coz I made u sad, but atleast I know that what it can result in, because

you were open about the thing you felt. Continue this, I won't feel bad or anything you may overthinking. I

was thinking of sending you another bracelet but here I don't know anyone who would paytm me some

money but yes you can't lose this or anything, you probably can lose the newsletter or even the bracelet,

you probably can forget the site actual name but still chances are less you won't it's too easy. People like you

make me question that how it feels to be god's favorite. Hey, you when I say that you can easily have Ian, then

you easily can there is no if and but in it, I mean like how the fuck can you doubt it you are so you know you are

just so perfect. And yaa, what was that settling for less, Mahi I feel bad when you say things like that for yourself

don't ever say that yr, I believe so highly in what all you deserve and everything, don't say that pls, arrey, and

what were you saying ke I am settling for less, Oh Really 😑!, I would have never been in love with you if that was

true, yr you see it khud, The one who is liked by so many, likes me wow, isn't that great (yes, kids🤭). Don't think

of any stupid argument now pls. I like the feeling of loving, ya it not always is joy but it still is great, I was

never supposed to feel like this for someone this soon, it was completely unexpected for real, but many say that

most beautiful things are unexpected, maybe your birth too was such thing. You know whenever we're on a call

or vc and you laugh or something it just feels you know, I mean like you know it just feels good.

I don't know if you ever thought but still you may know the reason that why I love you so much.

There are countless reasons but still we can count some. First of all, the respect for the efforts you've made,

First message to now. Respect is the most superior thing at least for me. Second, its your personality

its really charming, I don't know how people can hate you, maybe they are jealous that they ain't you.

Obviously, the world got only piece like you. Third is your passion towards your goals, yes, that's attractive,

I like it. Fourth, we can say way your of thinking, it isn't simple but it feels good. Fifth, how you keep note

of the minor details, I can't even imagine myself remembering someone's birthday just a week after they tell

me. I didn't mention looks because I would love you the same even if you go plump🤭, don't worry about

that though, nothing gon happen like this.

So, I know that sometimes some stuff in our relation may bother you but you don't need to be, about

anything. It will be good if one day you clear your mind, about every insecurity you have or any

stuff that might be bothering you. Stop overthinking for the negative possibilities please, don't play

with your emotions in such way. You should be, like you know, what can I say, carefree about this.

Nothing will change. I won't change either, I mean like I may change someday but nothing between

us would ever. And yes that stuff 'Altered' stuff, nothing is altered just believe me for one last time,

its just I don't want you or anyone to feel the way I have felt for even once in my life especially by

my actions, that is why when I text, things may feel to be. I ain't good with that texting thing. But see,

I still text you first many times. Ohkk, So we've been through a rough patch in 2021 but we got out of

it, ya it took a bit time but outcome is what matters. We great now for real again. You know when it

started, the rough time, I felt like it was because of some argument we had, I thought it would be fixed

but it was different. Let me take you through the timeline of it from my perspective, Initially I was

like, its nothing it will be fixed in no time and won't lie I felt that happening but just for few days,

then I was like what's happening had no clue, then I was like I wanna talk, didn't wanna make some random

speculations, Ohkk then, the day comes and we talk, I for real was in emotions by the end of it, it mmmm

prolly was just a half an hour chat but like ya it left me in emotions, from that day I turned them into

rage. I already told you that I was so ready to cut you off but I don't know what always stopped me,

I mean like I was always like just few more days it will be fixed, just few more days, in this phase I

swear those Good Morning and Good Night texts were irritating like hella irritating and you know you

sometimes would miss them and I would be like maybe the cut off thing is happening like by itself.

You know, I disabled my ID, it was to stay away for a while so that I don't spill anger but then our

great Mahi reached me out on snapchat, I mean yes I respect those efforts but I was like 'huh', but ya

the day came we talked it out and all and eventually what matters it that all of it got fixed. You

know once you asked me that 'do you hate me yet ?' and I for real didn't otherwise this would haven't

been fixed and answer too was 'No I don't' but in my brain it was like 'Ya I don't but why shouldn't

I😂'. Acha ,you know the day it was going to get fixed, the day we talked, you started your story and you

know you wont believe but in my head it was like 'kehde ke relationship mein aagyi isliye ye hua' and by

the end for real happened and I for real smiled ke yeah again correct, it was a proud moment, I mean

like am I god or something but my feel just amazing, you gotta accept it bruh. Arrey, and thanks for

that album idea 'The Lights Were...' not too much thank either bro, its the most difficult stuff I've

ever had an idea of. Ohkkk, throw all this behind yr, I don't matter at all because its all good now,

I mean like 'maybe some stars do return😅'. So na what happened was ke one day in coaching my

friend and I were discussing some random stuff he said ke 'saale maine suna ke Himachali bhot sahi

hoti hn or Punjab mein kaafi rehte hn' and literally your image popped in my head and I was like 'Yeah

I can bet on that'. Yr he had my phone he opened snapchat, it was locked I opened it and na he opened

your chat and you had those lines saved on it, I snatched and he was like 'bc usne itna kyun likha h'

and I was like 'ha-ha tujhe kya krna h' no one in this world respects privacy nowadays like see me with

the playlist stuff, huh that was smart but whatever not getting into that. Mahi yr you never told me

about you not liking your forehead, it is attractive to be honest, if you told me before about this, I

would have given theories that how it is attractive, I mean I once felt that you probably are kinda

insecure about that with no sense but I thought that it was all good after that fiery forehead pic of

yours. You know, as soon as I get my paytm filled I gon' pay you the bribe for that one line, one line,

one single line, yr you an expensive artist for real, huh no issue we know the worth. You crying while

saying 'you're 18 now' was just so cute I for real was like in awww vibes.

You know, I have never loved a friend so hard, or instead of friend we can say human, since 2009

(sister was born in 2009). No, I am not lying. Don't overthink anything it's simple. Never even respected a friend

as much as I respect you. You remember that I told you about how I don't care even if I lose a friend

that is still true but not in your case, I have for real a sense of loss for you and its rare because its

just 4 people who I can count in this (4 including you). No one knows that when we gon meet next time,

but I promise that I will try to make it possible. Please don't be insecure about our friendship, I will make

sure that nothing harms it ever. This might not happen but even if our conversation ever stops I promise

you will always be at the same place for me in my entire life. You're like a family to me I will make sure

my kids know about you😅. I ain't blaming you or anything but if you told me how you felt a bit earlier we could

have had more better time or moments or whatver you say them together. I am just so obsessed with you now

yr. No don't cry, You aren't crying, but still, keep smiling, You did smile maybe now. You remember us

talking about Loving someone and being in love with someone, you were just trying to explain it in theory

but woah you really gave me the practical of the latter😅. You know, I just sometimes sit and think that

wow I love her so much, and also that wish we could have had more time together like you know someday a

great time with each other. You know, I just wrote a random line, like outta nowhere and at that time I was

thinking about you, and it went like 'Nothing is Perfect but only the things you love for real', and you know it

might sound weird but I easily can find flaws in myself, but if I ever even try finding them in you, I'd fail.

You just define this line for me now. You know, you don't know but how great is feels when I know that you today

are happy, like nowadays you be sending voice notes and like sound sad, ya I feel sorry for that and not being

able to help you, you know you when like you know the real energy it feels great to be honest, like I feel good

to know it too. You probably are reading this and going through some stuff I just wanna remind you that Mahi

your happiness matters to some and it matters to some real extent. You just gotta know it, there are people

who will love to see you happy and cheered up Mahi. Your happiness sometimes ain't only yours.

How can there be a conversation with me not talking anything about music. I am just listing few songs, I don't

know how many you have already heard but these are just those songs which I love to listen when I ain't feeling

good, kind of you know lifting up stuff. I ain't saying that listen now but if you ever feel like low you can TRY

because it may help, and that is why sometimes I share music so that maybe it can cheer up someone a bit.

You can say it a love language.

Love Yourz - J.Cole

Premeditated Murder - J.Cole

Cheer Up - J.Cole

I Get Up - J.Cole (This song, I love),(Support when anxiety struck)

Show me Somethin - J.Cole (Song I sometimes rely on),(Support when anxiety struck)

Just Believe - G-Eazy

My Life - NF

My Stress - NF



1-800-273-8255 - Logic

Not Afraid - Eminem

Hope They Help You When You Find Yourself Lonely and Low !

Maybe I will have to end this conversation for now, I am taking a lot of your time.

Forgive me for my mistakes chief. Keep eating, keep smiling, keep texting and

never forget that if you become too thick someday and don't find any boy, just

find me (It won't happen) I'll be there for you always. One thing, don't let

everyone else call you Snorlax because you can be anyone's Mahi but you are

my Snorlax, I mean like I always in my chilhood wanted to have a pokemon and be a great pokemon trainer😅.

And, yeah, no hard feelings for you rejecting me twice and that too within a month By the way thanks for

choosing me. But all this aside, I wish you achieve everything in your life and always feel cheered up

and thank you for forgiving me for my stupidity everytime.

LOVE YOU A LOT!!!!!

Byeeeee for now !!!.